I know some things are a matter of taste, but some things are a matter of truth. And while it is debatable that truth is at times a matter of taste, it is undeniable that taste is sometimes a matter of truth. And in this case, the truth is that whole wheat pasta tastes revolting. The truth needs to come out, and more people need to feel free to speak it.
It’s not like I don’t know how good for you it is, it’s just that it is so bad to me. And it’s not like I don’t care about health, I care! I don’t love obesity. I don’t hate bowel regularity. But I hate this. I hate eating this garbage.
The whole wheat-pasta union is a perversion of nature, it was never meant to be. Whole wheat was for molasses-dark peasant breads kneaded by ruddy-cheeked women with large forearms. Baked in communal ovens in the mountain village square. It was consumed back in the days when our palates were less developed; you know, back when we were fighting wars over salt. It was then paired with offensively aroma-ed cheeses, possibly topped with raw onions. We’ve come a long way since then.
I don’t know when pasta came along by comparison (Wikipedia wasn’t too forthcoming on this topic), but I’m pretty sure there’s a reason that—if whole wheat pasta had ever existed—whole wheat pasta was for centuries ignored. That is, until its benefits were preached by the same people who tried to make wheatgrass shots happen; now it’s a thing, and Dr. Oz is telling me I should eat it.
So I gave it a go. I love pasta and needed to find a way to make the relationship work. Like dating online, it took a lot of tries and the end result is a marriage that happens not because of its autonomous merits but only because it looks good compared to the others.
{ 0 comments }












